While based on this shared belief, the AA program does not promote or favor any particular or an exact concept of a Higher Power.
~ AA Wisdom
The freedom offered in Step # 11 is freedom from loneliness. I thank goodness every day that AA is a spiritual program, not a religious one. I spent 17 years as an agnostic until I found AA. Some kind lady took me under her wings back then. She knew that under all that anger and rage, was a scared little girl that felt unlovable and undeserving. She was not afraid of my abusive nasty demeanor. She knew there is goodness even in the worst of us. Most folks kept a safe distance from me, and I was just fine with that. I did not know if I could trust them, anymore than they could trust me. But, that lady was different. For some reason, I let her draw close. I wanted what she had. Her first assignment for me in step #2, was to write a want ad for an HP that I could trust. For the first time in a very long time, I felt I had a choice.
In Step # 11, the key words are Spiritual Awareness. One cannot have a conscious contact or even a sense of spiritual connection, until they have spiritual awareness or awakening. That makes sense, right? I hope so. So, what is spiritual awareness? Some say it is intuition; a sense of being, not just doing. I had no concept of God. I hated the very word, so I adopted G.O.D. = Group of Drunks. I trusted the group was bigger and stronger than myself. That worked for the first 5 years. Some folks report big, earth shaking “oh wow” moments, seeing the light, or having a great spiritual experience. When I first went sober, that happened. But, since then, most spiritual moments have been “oh, gee” moments….kismet…where things just happen nicely and easily, as if they were meant to be. Whatever your spiritual awakenings may be, spend a few moments in awe.