Your job now is to be be in a place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others. ~ Big Book, Page 102
Have you noticed the meetings are packed since the holidays are over? I have. Everyone is swearing off or swearing on for the new year. I hope they all find recovery. I hope they find what they are looking for. I remember many a new year came and went, and I never changed a thing. Thus, I would get to late January, and then I’d go on a tear to make up for wasted time. I had the best of intentions, but I never was willing to make the necessary changes to secure any length of sobriety. Tonight’s topic was about going into places where alcohol is served if we are in fit spiritual condition and have a good reason for being there. I could always come up with great reasons and rationalizations for being around people and place where drinking was happening. The Big Book refers to that as “enjoying vicariously.” I could get high off the fumes. No problems.
What I heard tonight resonated with me: that we are judgmental toward those who are drinking to excess. I do not judge those who drink as bad or evil, but I do care that they are destroying their lives and health, especially if I am close to that person. I do not want them to have pain in their lives. Call me co-dependent. I am. I think it is pretty human for us to care. The big difference these days, is that I don’t interfere with their actions. I do leave when it gets too uncomfortable. In my family, it is usually the next morning when they go for the 3rd beer/cigarette run. Nothing good happens after that. At any rate, I am glad that we have so many new people seeking recovery. I hope they find what they are looking for. Be there to welcome them.